prostitution – The Softer Sex

I emailed Candy after I added her zine to The Softer Sex. She agreed to answer my “20 Questions” and here they are…

Is your attitude towards your work responsibilities and clients endemic to Amsterdam, considering that it has a longer history and acceptance of prostitution than many other places in the world (that is where you work, right?) or do you feel it is unique to your self?

I want to be clear from the outset in answering these questions that my experience of sex work is purely my own, I can’t speak for other sex workers. Although having said that, I don’t think there’s anything about me or the places I’ve worked that’s especially ‘unique’ or unusual. Ditto for Amsterdam – I actually started off working in Australia, and my experiences in terms of clients and work responsibilities were very similar in the two contexts, even though the legal framework for sex work is different.

In your experience with other women in your field would you say that the high majority have been exposed to the same kinds of rights and options as you have? There are so many stereotypes about your industry and the concept of “choice”. In general, in your knowledge, how much say do sex workers have when it comes to working hours, attire and services, etc? What is dictated by pimps/managers of the brothels/clubs?

Like I said before, in my experience I don’t think there’s anything that’s especially unusual about my experience as a sex worker. And I’ve worked in a whole bunch of different places, in different countries, with people from different backgrounds. In general I think how much say sex workers have over things like working hours, attire and services really depends what section of the industry they’re in, and who they’re working for. I figure that people that have no ‘boss’ probably have the most say, because they’re running their own business (which could mean sex workers who work privately, or in the windows of Amsterdam, or on the streets). But that’s not my experience as I’ve mostly worked for managers/owners in brothels or strip clubs. I’d say I had a lot of say in my working conditions. Firstly, I would choose a workplace with services that suited me (e.g. if I didn’t want to offer full service I could do stripping or massage instead), and also shop around for places to work that suited my style. Like, some bosses are stricter about what you wear – ‘high class’ places that I’ve worked at often insist on particular ‘classy’ looking dresses (whatever that means!), and that you wear stockings (for some unknown reason they think bare legs are ‘tacky’). I’ve worked in a whole bunch of different places, and the places I’ve had the most freedom to choose what to wear/when to work have actually been the more ‘seedy’/’low class’ joints. But really it all comes down to who’s in charge – like any workplaces, some bosses are jerks. The good thing about sex work is that I’ve found I’ve had a lot of choice in where I can work – so if I don’t like the boss or the conditions, I’ll just go to another brothel or strip club, and I can start working in another place that day.

I thought quite a bit about the customer to service provider relationship after reading your zine. There certainly are very warped ideas about this in retail which have always seemed bizarre to me as well; “The client is always right” … What else do you have to say about this?

Like I wrote in my zine, this was a HUGE difference between retail work and sex work – and also was completely the opposite to all my assumptions about the industry. I realize that before I started sex work myself, I’d bought into this idea that sex work was “selling your body” – that a booking would mean letting a client do whatever they wanted in the allocated time. This couldn’t be further from the truth. In reality, my interactions with clients are negotiated from the get-go, and there are clear limits on what can take place. Like for example, often I don’t kiss, though I might allow kissing for an extra payment (which I can decide based on the client – if they’re pushy, or have bad breath, I might decide not to offer that service). It’s actually really funny because this perception is out there, yet I feel so much more empowered in sex work than I have in any of the free sex I’ve had with men for fun. At work, and since working, I feel much more able to speak up about what I’m okay with, and what I don’t like, or do want. It’s really ironic because it took sex work to make me really understand (and get really good at) knowing how to advocate for myself sexually, how to stop putting up with mediocre (or bad) sex, and how to be really open and honest about what I’m into.

Coffee & a danish or Tea & a crumpet?

Can I take coffee and a crumpet? Or if I MUST choose in the given groupings, I’ll take coffee & a danish, even though I don’t like danishes (but coffee is my queen!)

On an off day what would you do in your city?

Hmm hard to say… I think I’d do something that was completely unrelated to the city I was in – but something bloody wonderful like going to see a movie in the afternoon, or taking my cute dog for a walk, or doing some sewing, baking or gardening.

On a Sunday afternoon I love to….

Same as above – although also hanging out with friends. And in summer, I love the beach and/or afternoon drinks at the pub or in the park.

Favorite hairstyle? (your interpretation of “hairstyle)

My favourite hairstyle is ever-changing. As exhibited by the fact that I change my hair about once every 3 months. I get bored so easily!

Cycling with a skirt or Jeans & sneakers?

Hmm I tend to cycle in jeans and sneakers, even though cycling in a skirt looks hella sexy.

Favorite food?

Pizza. PIZZA!!

The piece of my body I love best is…..because….

My butt. I think it looks good.

Do you have savings and or financial plans for your future?

I’m saving at the moment which is really great. Not sure what I’m going to do with the money though? Maybe I’ll travel, although I really should pay off my student loan instead!

A great date night is…..

Whiskey and adventures – preferably in an abandoned building.

The book next to your bedside right now is…

“The House of the Spirits” by Isabel Allende

Current fav dance track?

This changes all the time, but right now it’s probably “Your Woman” by White Town. Yay 90’s revival!

What is the best part of your day?

My morning ritual. Which is having a coffee and breakfast in bed while reading.

Candy Tricks shows us her breakfast rirual, crumbs and all... — Candy Tricks shows us her breakfast rirual, crumbs and all…

What is the favourite part of your job?

When I was stripping, my favourite part was definitely dancing. I fucking love to dance. Now that I’m mostly doing full service, I reckon it would be getting to meet lots of really sweet people that I probably would never come across outside of work.

Are there awkward moments in sex work?

Yes. There are definitely awkward moments! Sex can be awkward – especially when you’re having it with someone for the first time. But I find awkwardness a bit cute, so the awkward clients are often my favourite.

Strangest request you’ve had from a client?

I find this question difficult to answer, even though it’s one I get asked all the time as a sex worker! I find it hard to answer because I think it’s all about laughing at people’s “weird” kinks. Whereas I think there’s nothing wrong with any sexual practice that’s safe and consensual. And in all honesty, the most surprising thing about my job is how FEW strange requests I get – the majority of my clients want the same kind of ‘normal’ sex. I wish I had more kinky clients!

What is your grooming routine made up of?

Hmm not very much to be honest! I’m pretty lazy on the whole ‘grooming’ side of things. From doing sex work I’ve started to embrace this a bit more – often through learning about stuff by talking with other workers. But really I’m a rough ‘n tumble gaybo that prefers not to shave my legs or even brush my hair.

What items are always in your fridge?

Tomatoes. Soy milk (for coffee). Hot chili sauce (yum)

I found Patric Fouads images of German brothel interiors by accident when I bought an edition of Design Week in 2005. The gaudy kitschness and the definite inimitable style of the spaces combined with their function is intriguing. I tore the article out of the mag all those years ago and kept it along with so much other female related material…

Amazon, who sells Fouad’s book “Frauenzimmer”, writes about the book:

Since 2001, prostitution is no longer illegal in Germany. Patric Fouad gives us rare insights into the interiors of eleven rooms of brothels all over Germany. The photographer left the places he saw unchanged in order to allow the most authentic view of the scene. Despite the absence of any human beings, the interiors speak for themselves: The pompous elegance of some and the imaginative or reduced decoration of others suggest the wishes of the clientele that is being served. The candid images are strong in their impact and yet subtle in their implications. By leaving out the main characters, the viewer’s imagination and curiosity is increased even further. A high quality coffee-table book of a different kind.

The article in Design Weekly from 10 February 2005, written by Clare Dowdy, reads:

Sex is everywhere. Harmony has a licensed sex shop on London’s Oxford Street, Hustler has opened a “department store” in Birmingham and has its sights set on the major European cities; Ann Summers is planning to open outlets in Spain; and Selfridges-based sex toy retailer Tabooboo has 60 vending machines in bars and clubs across the UK and stores planned for the continent. Even venerable high street chemist Boots the Chemists briefly mooted giving vibrators shelf space alongside shampoos and verucca treatments.

All this in-you-face activity around Europe is the result of our increasingly relaxed attitude towards sex (think Sex And The City) and legislation that is gradually being relaxed. A recent development in Germany is the legalisation of prostitution, which came into force in 2001. This- in theory at least- means selling sex is now like any other business and should be treated as such. Hard to swallow, but Patric Fouad’s photographs go some war to persuading us of that. There are around 400 000 practising prostitutes in Germany, with more than half offering services in brothels. Fouad, who was born in Düsseldorf, has chosen to shoot the interiors of 11 of these venues as you might shoot a restaurant or retail environment. “I wanted to make these rooms accessible to the public, especially women,” he explains. What started out as a thesis project for the University of Applied Sciences in Dortmund has ended up as a coffee-table book: Frauenzimmer, Brothels in Germany. Its title is a (German) play on words: archaic German for woman, Frauenzimmer’s literal meaning is “women’s rooms”.

Despite their new-found legitimacy, Fouad had to go to considerable lengths to get access. It all started with an intense internet search- no mean feat considering that many of the brothels are registered via paysites that require a log-in. Contact details of the operators were also supplied through journalists and social workers. Then it was a case of calling the patrons up and persuading them to agree to the photo shoot. “I tried various strategies, using different choices of wording,” he says. “Usually, after a brief moment of hesitation, they agreed.” And on location he was given a warm welcome.

As with many images of retail interiors, these are people-free zones, Fouad was not in the business of taking portraits and wanted the rooms to speak to themselves. “There are so many details, colours, patterns that repeatedly appear in the various bordellos and give an idea of the people who decorate and live in them,” he says. Clues to the nature of the room’s occupants include PVC novelties pinned to the wall and a pair of kitten heels by the bed. By shooting all the rooms, where possible, from the same angle, Fouad has presented us with a succession of comparable images. This gives the scenes a nice coherence and helps to concentrate the viewer’s eye. With their curtained or blacked-out windows, all illumination is artificial. As Fouad was determined to shoot these places in all their naked glory, there was minimal additional lighting and no styling. “Naturally, a well-kept room contributes to the image of the house and is therefore important to the owner as well as to the prostitute,” he points out.

While it doesn’t appear that these have had the interior design consultants in, they do display some rules of thumb concerning aesthetics and layout. Unsurprisingly , the main attraction is the bed, though it might surprise the uninitiated that many are single rather than double. This is because half the rooms featured were in the houses for “occasional traffic” or clubs. As well as the gadgetry, walls are adorned with mostly tacky art showing ladies in provocative poses. Meanwhile, the paraphernalia of the profession (lubricants, tissues and such like) stand brazenly by the bed. When it comes to aesthetics, red and pink dominate. In fact, all the colour combinations would make John Pawson followers reach for the bucket. Some of the rooms share common features, clearly a case of the owner getting a job lot of items such as bedspreads or lamps.

Frauenzimmer mixes images of decadence with those of mean cheapness, demonstrating both spectrums of the “profession”. As a book it works on two levels: an insight into a hidden world and a set of interiors images. Either way, it’s intriguing stuff.